I have a friend who gets mad over the most random things. He'll be watching the food channel, and then all of a sudden start screaming at the top of his lungs because rachel ray didnt pour the salt enough on the chicken... and hell start saying things like "she makes me want to cut my own dick off and eat it".... "what did he just say...?"

Sometimes when i watch jershey shore i feel like im watching animal planet. It's like they fist pump to attract mates.

pick up lines are great. every girl loves em. for example, if you went up to a girl at a bar and was like "you know, your eyes are the color of my porsche" i guarantee shed go home with you... not that im condoning any premarital intercourse...

and i have a few other jokes that talk about amish drama, amish cops, indian porn, edward cullen being like 30...
wat do you think guys? help me out too, my audience would most likely be high school to college students.